GOLDEN CHANCE

 

She was chopping cabbage, cutting each slice as though not interested in making lunch at all. She remembered the day when she last made that sabzi.

It was the same table, chopping the same vegetable for lunch when the doorbell rang. She strode towards the door wiping her hands with the cloth she grabbed hastily from the table. Madhav stood there with a sullen face, which she inferred 'something bad happened and I don’t want to talk about it’ face.

She could feel her stomach churn inside.

What was that all about? She couldn’t understand was it fear? or excitement? Or maybe it was all inside her head? or maybe she’s just thinking too much.

Madhav dashed inside and practically collapsed on the sofa, he looked tired. Meghna went back to the kitchen to fetch him a glass of water.

Walking back she wondered why is he home so early? What happened? Was everything okay, as he said yesterday? It certainly must be the new project he’s handling, she could only remember the words he kept saying over and over again, words like ‘golden chance’ ‘promotion’ ‘eternal’.

She was too busy prepping his breakfast and packing his lunch, so she thought it was easy to pretend to listen. He's been like this for over a month now, uncomfortably excited about the project. She too had things to talk about like how her mother and father were in Shimla for their summer holidays and how his brother has been selected for some national level exam, oh and most important of all how they have been missing the doctor's appointment for last 4 weeks! Ridiculous! but all she could hear was 'oh, this is my big break. I am going to make it huge. This is my golden chance blah, blah, blah' she was now growing sick of his exaggerated versions of how his job was the 'greatest job' in the whole wide world. SHE WAS SIMPLY DONE!

Thoughts kept crawling in as she prepared his thali. Is there some issue with the boss? Who told him to take up some work he couldn't handle? Look what has happened now, he barely talks to me, is always on the phone even while eating or watching a movie together, and looks tired all the time. The result of not getting enough sleep, if you ask me. And he doesn't even admit it! God! You can never understand men, they and their fragile egos. It wouldn't kill him to just say "honey! I am tired, so tired" obviously I would have understood, sure it would have taken some time.

She suddenly realized that he came home empty-handed no bag, no tiffin not even scooter keys. Something's not right, he's never been like this, full of himself, never. For a millisecond she felt as if he was hiding something from her but she threw that thought away thinking how could it be? And why would he hide anything from me?

Her chain of thoughts was interrupted by Madhav’s voice, he was loud. She, for a second, thought to eavesdrop but before she could put the plan into action she heard a loud bang coming out from the bedroom. She rushed over to find the table clock in pieces, it was the one he gifted her on their second anniversary. The card said

“All of my time is yours now.” so romantic! she thought.

She picked up the remains of the watch with tears in her eyes. She collected the shattered glass, threw them in the dustbin, and quietly headed back to the kitchen. She set the table with the thali and spoonful of his favourite pickle which she thought might elevate his mood a little.

It’s been seven hours Madhav was nowhere to be found.

Late in the night, His lawyer did show up.

“You might want to sit down for this, Mrs Desai"

She sank to the sofa as he said as if knowing what was to fall upon her.

Mr Siddhiqui put forth some paper with red stamps on them, pointing where to sign, and definitively looked at her. She dare not read those papers.

Meghna, suddenly composed, held up the paper. She read it slowly, her eyes moving as she read, and then without giving it a second thought she signed wherever the lawyer wanted her to. She looked back at them with her swollen eyes, drained of hope and happiness but saying nothing's changed.

The question has been eating her up for two years now.

To her, that marriage, as she thinks of now, was like an exchange module, Madhav's entitlement of his house to her was as shocking as his leaving her was.

She thought she was a devoted wife, a perfect example, and a role model for others.

Devoted?.... What is devotion? She did not sleep with anyone else but him, does that count as devotion? Or is it that even when your husband cheats on you, forgive him? Why? Because obviously, you weren't able to satisfy him. Or is she just a coward not to address this matter and have a low-lying profile, act it was your fault? Or maybe she was lazy or afraid that he would leave her for the same.

Perhaps there may be another reason, she was happy with what she had, that may certainly qualify as devotion because something has to, right?

She was happy the nightmare was over now.

what begins…ends anyway.